plz talk dirty to me
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
