This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
