Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Come on in and take your pants off
So. Much. Porn.
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