Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
