so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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