Are we in a gay sports bar?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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