Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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