bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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