why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I see more hoeing in ur future
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