They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
