She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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