If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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