Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize