5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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