As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
