it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
