Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
My penis needs a shock collar
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
