Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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