If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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