Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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