Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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