Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Dicks are not precious.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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