all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
