my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
