is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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