i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
