Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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