Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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