I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Randomize
