yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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