eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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