So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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