You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
