I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
