i don't like sucking hair
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize