Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize