did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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