...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
