I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
