Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
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