hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
