Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You made out with two different species that night
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Randomize
