Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
