actually, I'm a sock model
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
