Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
