that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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