Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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