they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
