So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
