I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
