i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
